You matter more than you know… and even though you know that, you’re not sure how exactly you can begin to live your life in a way that honours that knowledge..
I know exactly how that feels…
These days I’m a happy shiny soul – but that’s because I’ve walked a challenging path from being a very unhappy, ‘barely there’ person who didn’t even know I had a soul, and I’ve come out the other side wiser, brighter, stronger and lighter.
I’ve learned how to make my life one I’m delighted every day to be living in – and I want nothing more than to help other women have the same – because life is too short to spend it living in cruise control, heading unaware to a destination you didn’t even set.
Your life is happening RIGHT NOW. And you owe it to yourself to live it with full expression and awareness of the incredible person you already are – without apology. That is your birthright. And it is my dream for us all.
“What if the task is simply to unfold, to become who you already are in your essential nature – gentle, compassionate, and capable of living fully and passionately present? How would this affect how you feel when you wake up in the morning?” Oriah Mountain Dreamer
Society defines me by the letters I have after my name: BSc Hons, PgDip, DipBSS-Do, RCST, RYT200 – but these are merely a small part of a much bigger picture, one which has brought me to right here, to this point, to a place where I feel utterly sure I can access all that I need to help you.
A lot of that picture comes from my training and experience, but an even bigger part stems from years of uncovering, rediscovering, unveiling and owning who I am here to be. It comes from finally being able to sit comfortably in my body, unafraid to share my inner wisdom, and unafraid to show you who I am. I have learned that we are all born with an utterly unique blueprint, our essence – which contains the core of what we need to know, what we are here to contribute, and what we need to learn.
I forgot about my blueprint, my uniqueness, what I had to offer of value, for a very long time. We all forget. We bow down to society demands and expectations, we unwittingly take criticism and negative messages on board, we people-please, learn to stay ‘under the radar’ and we slowly build layers of protection around us – until eventually our inner essence becomes so tightly locked up inside us, that we forget it is even there.
This was me for a very long time. Until I learned how to start listening to my body, start heeding its messages, and I started following the breadcrumb trail that led me through an amazing journey of learning incredible things that helped me fully embody myself again, and that can also help you do that too.
The details for the details people:
Aka how I got from the start, through a tunnel, and back out to the brightness...
I was definitely put on this earth to help people and that theme has been running in the background of my life for as far back as I remember. I have always been the sensitive one that could physically ‘feel’ other people’s pain and see the things they were hiding behind a veil of being ‘alright’ when others hurt them, and I was always the one smoothing the way and making things better, even though I didn’t always know how…
Growing up, I knew that I was different – I didn’t know then that it was because I was so acutely aware of everything around me and I saw things that others didn’t notice, because I was awake and aware and bright and excitable. I loved to daydream and read and write and climb trees, and I was equally happy with others, or on my own.
I didn’t fit in. Over time, I started to believe other people’s messages that I wasn’t good enough, and I quietly started to retreat. I forgot that I was bright and awake and I learned how to stay quiet and keep under the radar. As a teenager I found ways to escape the world – mostly involving illegal substances and self-destructive habits, and inevitably I ended up lost and severely depressed.
Into the Wilderness
The ‘Wilderness Years’ followed, where lots of ‘bad things’ happened – until the day I was brought up short by the death of a close friend to cancer. The day after she died, a very clear message sounded in my head – I don’t know exactly where it came from, but it was the first time I started listening to my inner wisdom, to my gut, my intuition – and although it took years, this thought started the process of turning my life around.
The message was: ‘Would I feel cheated if I died tomorrow?’
The answer, clearly, was YES. Because I hadn’t even ‘started’ yet – at 24, I still had this sense that I was waiting for something – but in the meantime I was sleepwalking through life and had forgotten my uniqueness…
I realised I had been gifted with intelligence and I owed it to myself to use it, so I started thinking about what I loved to do and what I was good at, and I decided to do a Radiography degree. I was still not fully listening to my heart, because what my heart wanted to do was an English degree, but I let my head win, and I chose the vocational route.
Needless to say, after ‘not very long’, I knew this wasn’t right for me, so I trained in ultrasound too… but for a myriad of reasons, this eventually wasn’t right either. I was getting tired of not ‘finding my thing’ by now after so much hard work, and I started to fall back into my self-destructive habits, doing things that didn’t honour me and retreating again, back into depression and anxiety.
Around this time, I was lucky enough to have a friend that saw something in me I couldn’t see, and because of this, I was set-up on a blind date with my soul-mate, Gavin. This was my second wake-up call – because he loved me enough to be my champion, my mentor, and my challenger. He wouldn’t let me fall into a pit, and he helped me to start seeing my inner value again – he helped me to start becoming a better version of myself, whilst I helped him do the same.
Again I started listening, and I decided to honour my desire to help people, in a different way to the conveyor-belt of the NHS. I started practising yoga and meditation, reading self-development books and spent years training in Shiatsu, Cranio-Sacral Therapy and more recently, Yoga.
The subsequent meandering self-development pathway has led me to where I now am – the protection layers are peeling back, my heart is open again, I remember my uniqueness, I remember my voice, I hear my inner wisdom, I am committed to honouring myself, committed to helping others, and committed to staying awake, aware and shining as brightly as I possibly can!
This is not to say that the intervening years haven’t had other wake-up calls – because they have. I have navigated my way through a lot of emotional and physical trauma, I’ve cheated death and I’ve been through major surgery – twice. 2015 sadly saw the loss of my 39 year-old sis-in-law Toni to cancer, which has created a whole new level of understanding, focus and determination to step up and serve.
Luckily, my ‘tool box’ means I’ve come out the other side of life’s challenges with a huge appreciation for life, a love of people and nature, and a genuinely positive outlook. The steps are simple – acceptance, trust, alignment, connection, nourishment, mindfulness, stillness and grounding. The time taken to walk them with some level of skill is infinite – but I guarantee you’ll have a lot of fun, ease and space on your journey!
I have always seen the beauty in every person, from babies through to octogenarians, from people that are bright and full of life, or those that are downtrodden and exhausted – whatever their story, however deeply hidden, I’ve always seen the bright sparkling light within every person. It is there inside you. I know that like I know I breathe. I want you to know it and feel it too…
Having experienced my own, very disturbed wilderness years and emerged the other side, stronger and brighter, I now firmly believe we all have the resources to deal with whatever comes our way, even if we don’t always know it at the time. The things that happen to us teach us valuable lessons and form a pathway, which whilst convoluted, always makes sense one day – and then we are able to put the jigsaw pieces together, shed our layers, unveil our essence and shine brightly again.
We all have a divine right to live our lives as fully as possible – which means we need to honour our deepest desires, listen to our hearts, optimise our energy, free up our bodies, live with awareness and presence, be endlessly curious and grateful for each day, and love and laugh whenever possible! My wish is that this website and my work will help start that process for you.
I am fully insured and registered with the Complementary and Natural Health Care Council. I am a registered Yoga Teacher with Yoga Alliance Professionals. This accreditation demonstrates excellent standards as set by Yoga Alliance Professionals. I have a natural appreciation of the need for client confidentiality, and offer an empathic and non-judgemental service, seeing my practice as a two-way partnership – my work can have miraculous effects in someone who is ready to take the steps to their desired outcome and meet me half way.